da wurlds largest exchang... of ur fundz to sumone els. meet Sefu, a very sefu safe. he iz fine. evrything iz fine. 💦
BUNANCECA: cumin soon (it iz sefu)go ahed. press it. ur fundz r rite ther.
da real storee. bad speling. 100% sefu.
boss post about sum unscheduld server maintenence. no need 2 FUD he say. few hourz l8r: 7,000 BTC (~$40M) leev in ONE transakshun. dey pay it back from da SAFU fund. da meme waz born. 👶
✅ dis part iz real
numbrz go from $1.7B to $5.8B depending who u ask. if it hold up = biggest crypto hak EVR. bigger den da bybit one ($1.5B). investigaterz point at north korea. nobody confirm yet. securitee team waz... busy. 😴
⚠️ real, but numbrz r reportd estimatez
exchang say fundz r safe and dey will cover ALL lossez. then pause witdrawalz + deposits 4 "securitee chekz". old boss post on X dat it look like a hak, and he expect all user fundz 2 be coverd. sefu. 🙏
✅ real
tether + circle freez billionz of da stolen stablecoinz. exchang say $2.54B verifyd frozen. hakker cant spend da ice cube part lol. da BTC and ETH part tho... 🫠
✅ real
bitcoin dump under $80K. $600M+ liquidashunz in 1 hour. BNB -7%. and da hakker didnt even take da BNB 💀 (onchain data say BNB balanse untuched). ouch.
✅ real
binance pauzed witdrawalz so evryone ran 2 hyperliquid. so we did 2. $BUNANCE launchd on stonkfun, paired wif HYPE. 1% tax on evry trade gets paid bak 2 holderz in HYPE. da onli exchang dat pays U instead of da hakker. ur witdrawalz r always open — its ur walet dummy.
🤡 dis part iz a memesources (we can reed): CoinDesk, TechCrunch, CNBC, The Block, Axios, Investing.com/Glassnode — Oct 29–30, 2026; 2019 storee from press at da time. hak numbrz r estimatez — da exchang hasnt confirm a final total. we jus make memez.
tap 2 open. saev. post. spred da sefu.
premium animashun. tap 🔊 4 sound.
we tried. 🧮
we hav audited ourselvz. Sefu opened himself up. inside: 1 moth, 1 cobweb, 1 penny. fully backd. trust me bro.
on stonkfun. eezy. eeven Sefu can do it (he cant)
download phantom walet. writ down ur seed frase. on PAPER. not on a hot walet. we lernd dis 2day.
get SOL in phantom 4 gas. we r paired wif HYPE, so swap sum SOL → HYPE if stonkfun asks 4 it. onli use da HYPE token linkd on our stonkfun page — fake HYPE iz evrywher.
open stonkfun.xyz, connect walet, paste da CA from up top. make sure its da rite one. fake bunz r evrywher.
congratz. holderz get a cut of da 1% tax, paid in HYPE. ur fundz r now sefu*.
*not finanshul advise. dey r not sefu. nuthin iz sefu.
everyting red. bitcoin red. SOL red. Sefu face red. exept HYPE and da bun. da bun go 2 da moon.
BYE ON STONKFUN 🍔🚀
4 ur protekshun. securitee chekz in progres. pls hodl. pls. PLS.
ur fundz r sefu (we tink)
